EMOTIONAL WOUND THESAURUS

GIVING A CHILD UP FOR ADOPTION



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HELPFUL TIP:

Emotional wounds will steer a character's behavior, corrupt his worldview, and cause negative traits to form. To understand exactly how this occurs, please read our tutorial for the Wound Thesaurus.

NOTE: We realize that sometimes a wound we profile may have personal meaning, stirring up the past for some of our readers. It is not our intent to create emotional turmoil. Please know that we research each wounding topic carefully to treat it with the utmost respect.
NOTES:
The process for adoption has changed over the years, so if your character has given up a child, carefully research the time period when it occurred. Depending on the date and location, the adoption may have been closed regardless of what the mother wished, she may have been coerced or forced into giving up her baby, or the type of adoption (open, semi-open, or closed) may have been her choice.

The level of pain this wound creates will likely depend on the reason for the adoption: to give one’s child a better life, because one was unable to care for a baby, due to a rape or unwanted pregnancy, if the adoption was required due to an incarceration, or something else. So dig into your character’s backstory as to why they made this choice.

WOUND CATEGORY:
Traumatic Events

BASIC NEEDS OFTEN COMPROMISED BY THIS WOUND:
love and belonging, esteem and recognition, self-actualization

LIES THAT MAY DEVELOP FOR CHARACTERS WITH THIS WOUND:
They would have been a terrible mother and the child is better off without them
The child must hate them, so they should stay away
If the child seeks them out, they should refuse to see him rather than have him learn what a disappointment they are
The child will never forgive them for giving him or her up
The child must hate them, and with good reason
They could never convince the child how much they wanted him or her, so there’s no point trying to explain
They gave up their child, so they deserve to be alone

THE CHARACTER MAY FEAR:
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POSSIBLE RESPONSES AND RESULTS:
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POSITIVE ATTRIBUTES THAT MAY RESULT:
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NEGATIVE TRAITS THAT MAY RESULT:
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TRIGGERS THAT MIGHT AGGRAVATE THIS WOUND:
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STEPS TOWARD HEALING:
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OPPORTUNITIES TO FACE OR OVERCOME THIS WOUND:
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