Relationship: EXES

EXES

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Relationships are part of the very fabric of your character’s life. How well or poorly they get along with others oftentimes comes down to personality, so carefully consider the positive traits and negative traits of your story’s cast. Another factor that can pull characters together or create friction is motivation, so keep each individual’s goal—both at the scene and story level—in mind as you write.

There are very few people in this world who don't have a romantic ex or two (or five?). When it comes to our characters, certain factors will impact the dynamics of this relationship and should be considered. Was the ex a spouse, lover, or boyfriend/girlfriend? How long did the relationship last? Are there shared responsibilities that keep the ex involved in the protagonist's life? Has the ex moved on, bringing new personalities into the mix that could create issues for the character? Was there abuse, infidelity, or another damaging event that would cause more than the usual bad feelings? Whatever the factors, this relationship will bring with it emotional baggage and inherent conflict, making it a useful option for our fictional characters.

Spending holidays or vacations together to maintain stability for the children

Continuing to cohabitate after the breakup (to save money, until a new job or apartment can be found, etc.)

Maintaining a civil relationship because of a shared goal (raising a child, owning a business together, etc.)

Agreeing to make certain important decisions together, such as when a child should get a phone or start dating

Putting on a happy face and hiding the negative emotions that crop up when the ex is present

One person being dependent on the other (pining after them, responding to every overture of reconciliation, continuing to seek them out for help, becoming obsessed, etc.)

Ignoring each other when they have to be in the same room

Refusing to be in the same room together

Close proximity always resulting in a fight or drama

Friends and family being forced to choose sides and cut ties with the ex

Using people and circumstances to punish the ex (by seeking custody of the children, withholding alimony payments, etc.)

Actively sabotaging the ex

An ex starting a new dating relationship or getting engaged
Being pressured by family members to get back together with the ex
The ex developing a serious or terminal illness
One party wanting to move far away while maintaining custody visitations with the children
The person with custody of the children falling ill or being incarcerated
The character who initiated the breakup realizing they did so based on incomplete or erroneous information
Either party experiencing a change of heart that pushes them to make amends or try and reconcile
An undesirable person entering the ex's life and influencing or endangering the character's children
A new circumstance that pits the exes against each other (a difficult parenting decision, one party being blamed for the death of a pet, etc.)

EXES

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DESCRIPTION:

RELATIONSHIP DYNAMICS:

CHALLENGES THAT COULD THREATEN THE STATUS QUO:

WOUNDS THAT COULD FACTOR INTO THE RELATIONSHIP:

POSSIBLE CONFLICT SCENARIOS:

CONFLICTING DESIRES THAT CAN IMPAIR THE RELATIONSHIP:

CLASHING PERSONALITY TRAIT COMBINATIONS:

NEGATIVE OUTCOMES OF FRICTION:

FICTIONAL SCENARIOS THAT COULD TURN THESE CHARACTERS INTO ALLIES:

WAYS THIS RELATIONSHIP MAY LEAD TO POSITIVE GROWTH:

THEMES AND SYMBOLS THAT CAN BE EXPLORED THROUGH THIS RELATIONSHIP: